fyi

You can find more of me here:

• Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/expensive.mistakes
• Twitter: http://www.twitter.com/ExMi

Here are some things you may or may not know about me:

1. I am mother to The Kid. He was born in November 2007. I’d moved up to Joburg to start my second degree (a Masters’ degree in Public Law) and fell pregnant a month after moving out of my fathers’ house. Needless to say my dad was charmed. Not. But, even though The Kid was unplanned, he’s totally changed my life for the better. And I have absolutely no complaints about being his mom.
2. I have been dating my Boyfriend fiance for five years. We have a four year old, and have been living together for four years. That’s right. If you do the maths, I fell pregnant two months after we’d started dating. I’m very lucky to have accidentally fallen pregnant with him. We’ve had our ups and downs and we’ve fought our way through nearly everything. But I wouldn’t change a single second of it. Nor would I change anything about him for all the tea in China.
   
3. Relationships are hard work. And nothing worth having isn’t worth working at – so we work at our relationship. All the time. It’s an interesting cocktail of stubbornness, self-righteousness, determination, short fuses and hot tempers. Our fights are always epic and I’ve broken the same toe twice kicking The Boyfriend fiance in the shins. Oh yeah, I’ve had some real spectacular trailer park moments during a few of our brawls. The making-up is just as epic.
4. I’ve described our relationship, elsewhere, as being a love-hate relationship. We either love each other, or we hate each other. There’s no ambivalence, and there’s no luke-warm feelings. There’s just passion. We’re either killing each other or we’re loving each other. We drive each other absolutely batshitfucking crazy, yet we’re still together. Despite me having packed my possessions and moved out, numerous times. Despite everything – we love each other.
5. This is probably as good a time as any to inform you of my life philosophy. It can easily be summed up in these five little words. And it’s true.
6. I met my boyfriend fiance in a nightclub. You know how they say that you should never look for a boyfriend in anyone you meet at a nightclub? Well I think that’s bullshit. I met my Boyfriend fiance at a dodgy, dingy nightclub. I was drunk. It was my birthday. He was gorgeous. I was smitten. The rest is history.
7. I couldn’t have asked for a better Boyfriend, fiance even if I tried. Sure, he’s prone to asshole-moments and he’s given to be a bit hyper-sensitive and takes things a little too personally sometimes (but fuck, so am I and so do I, so he’s mostly forgiven, right?) He’s the kind of guy who gets in his car and goes to the shop at 11PM when I want an ice cream or a Milo milkshake. (Be right back, I forgot my milo milkshake on the counter downstairs) The kind of Boyfriend fiance who buys you a macbook and a Blackberry, iPhone just because he knows how much you want these things. The kind of Boyfriend fiance who buys you shoes and pays your dog’s (and cats’) vet bills. The kind who hates small dogs (and is allergic to cats) yet makes sure they’re up to date on their innoculations and lets them sleep on the bed most nights.) T The kind of Boyfriend fiance that hates his job, so you can love yours.
8. He’s an amazing father. The love he has for his son…blows me away on a daily basis. I guess it’s because I find it hard to believe that it’s possible that there’s another person on this planet who loves The Kid a teeny-tiny little bit almost as much as I do. Accidental/unintentional father or not, he’s the man who makes me realise ‘any man can be a father. It takes a special one to be a dad’. And he gets it right. He was meant to be a father.
9. He’s funny, but the kind of funny that knows when to be serious. The kind of funny that I can never do. Because everything to me is a joke. My sense of humour is both a weapon and my protection. His is the funny-because-its-funny kind of funny. And mine is funnyinthelaughingatotherpeopleisfunny kind of way. Funny the way roadkill isn’t.
10. He’s the kind of person who does things. Like take my dogs to the vet, order a Telkom ADSL line (and actually dig and run all the necessary cables for my line – from the street, through to the house), organise someone to remove the tiles on our balcony so that the tiles I chose can be installed. Or laid. Or whatever it is whoever it does, does to tiles. I do the planning and he does the execution. I’m the get-up and he’s the get-up and go.
11. He’s the yin to my yan. (Ying to my yang?) He likes the icing, and I like the sponge of a cupcake. He likes the walnuts and the brazil nuts in the nutmix we have, and I like the cashews and the macadamias. He hates the ones I love. He likes tomato sauce, I love mustard. He likes sweet, I prefer salty. We are completely different to each other. We are like opposing puzzle pieces – it’s our differences that help us fit together.
12. He is the first person, aside from my Kid, who I have actually thought about, before myself. Yes, I’m selfish. I blame it on only child syndrome. And with regards to my only child status and a sister andohlookanothersister present on the interwebs, all I have to say in response is: it’s complicated. Only child syndrome aside, my father raised me to be selfish. That there was no shame in putting number one first, and there was no shame in number one being yourself at all times. That was how he prepared me for the supposed harsh world that would await me once I finished high school. And I was selfish for a long time before I met The Boyfriend fiance. Selfish and stingy with my time and my affection. He changed that. He’s shown me the satisfaction that comes from putting others before yourself – and doing it because you love them -  is far more enjoyable than putting yourself first, all the time.
13. My child has his father’s surname, even though we’re not married. Why? Because my child’s father stuck around, accepted responsibility and was an actual father to his child. Even though he’d only known his child’s mother for two months. So I chose to honour him and show my appreciation, by allowing his child to have his name.
14. Perhaps when I get married I will take The Boyfriend’s fiance’s surname myself. Perhaps not. I’m quite partial to the idea of a double-barrel surname, I wont lie. Lots of girls had them at school, and I was secretly jealous.
15. I do plan on getting married. We’re finally engaged, so the next step is obviously getting married. Check the fuck out of my sparkle. I mean really. So yeah. Might even get married next winter, if we can pull it off before then. See my wedding inspiration boards here and here.
16. Although there will be prenuptials, and there will be watertight custody and access rights agreements in place, should happily ever after turn out to end in divorce. We love each other, but we’re practical. We’re romantics, but realists too.
    
17. I changed my mind about this part above. If it’s not for keeps - then why bother?
18. And for she who asked,  I don’t plan to wear white at my wedding, and I don’t know if The Boyfriend fiance would be keen on having the whole first dance thing (he’s like me, we’re not big on tradition or fuss) but if the song were one of my choosing, it would have to be Nouvelle Vague ‘In a Manner of Speaking’.  It reminds me of our first holiday together when we first started dating. Also? My dress will more than likely be a pale buttercup yellow.
19. My favourite number is 9. It’s also the day I was born. The number of months I carried my baby, the number of my house digits (if added together) and a predominant number in my cell phone number.  It’s my lucky number, the first number that comes to mind, and one of my favourite numbers to write by hand.
20. I have an addiction to words. Learning new words, looking up the meanings, spending a few minutes a day browsing online reference sites. Learning new, made-up words and expressions, watching how the English language is twisted, revitalised, made-new and butchered. Urban Dictionary is a particular favourite.  I used to read the dictionary when I was younger and I’d finished my library books and my dad didn’t have time to take me back to the library. I used to read the dictionary and make lists of all my favourite words. Someone who is fond of using long words is called a “sesquipedalian”, apparently.
21. After a year of working an amazing job as a writer, I decided that it it was too difficult for me to kill myself trying to maintain the family/work balance and I resigned from my job. I’m going back to being a work-from-home mom. I’m going back to having time for my family. I’m going back to finding my own happiness.
22. I’ve recently launched an online store selling my own skincare, bath/shower and beauty products – Body Thrills. It’s all handmade and homegrown indulgent deliciousness that’s good for your skin and guaranteed to thrill your body. Body Thrills is run with the help of some very important people. Lexi (design), Byron (development, technical, geek-stuff) and Graeme (marketing stuff, head cheerleader.) We have big plans for 2012. Big plans, I tell you!
    
23. I love my potty mouth. I don’t know why I like swearwords so much, but I do. I know it’s a tad childish, but I like using the eff word and the ess word and every other foul word I come across. I savour dirty words. Get used to it.
24. I’ve been blogging for six years now. I’ve changed blogs numerous times, have quit numerous times – but I always come back. What started out as ‘The Seaside Bakery’ (yup, believe it, it’s true) became ‘Expensive Mistakes & Cheap Thrills’ after watching a Karen Zoid music video on MK. And ultimately became ‘Life is Nothing But A Series of Blonde Moments‘ most recently. I love blogging. I love the people I’ve met through blogging and the lives and stories I have shared with other people through their blogs and my own.
25. My fiance doesn’t quite understand the blogging thing, and the need to ‘broadcast my life to the whole world’ as he puts it – but he lets me get on with it.
26. I have eight scars on my body. One from a caesarian. One from having a bone removed in my right wrist (it looks like I’m suicidal). One from having my quadriceps muscle repaired and stitched back onto the tendons and bones. One from having staples inserted (and later removed) from the growth plate on my right knee. I have a condition called osteochondroma, which was making my leg grow crooked. One from having a laparoscopy through my belly button. One over my left eye where I fell down the stairs (all 5 years of age) and opened my face on a brick. And others from various mishaps.
27. I can type faster than I write. I cannot touch-type, yet my typing is spectacularly fast. And I hardly ever make typos. In that same vein I hate it when I read something else (like a magazine, newspaper, advert-type thing) and the person cannot spell. It makes me want to take a red pen and correct it. My spelling has always been excellent. Must be because I read like a demon. I can also speed-read at an alarming rate.
28. I put a lot of thought into naming my child. My son isn’t named after a Brad Pitt movie, nor is he named after a character in a gay high school musical, he’s named after a plastic surgeon.
29. I am kitchen ninja extraordinaire. I make the best lasagna in the whole wide world. According to my Boyfriend fiance. My shortbread isn’t bad either, and I make a mean apple crumble and chocolate fridge cake. My ratatouille is insanely addictive and my homemade pizza is amazing too. I adore cooking.
30. I collect cook books and am always trying new recipes. Although my baking skills are somewhat lacking. I blame my oven. My favourite recipes? Vegetarian ones, although I will cook just about anything.
31. I live in the East Rand, Johannesburg. And I love it. Mostly because you can find anything on the east rand. I spend a lot of time documenting my love for and fascination with the east rand, on Instagram.
    
32. I love going to the library and spending ages wandering the aisles and making my selections. I love reading. Particularly fantasy. But a particular kind of fantasy – anything with dragons, elves, magic, dwarves and epic quests and battles between good and evil = right up my alley. I’m also firmly against e-readers – I love books. But I don’t usually keep them, once I’m done with them. I’m one of those people that believes a good read must be shared, and if I enjoy something – I pass it along to someone else. All other books get passed onto a second-hand bookshop when I get the chance.
33. I love making lists. I love reading other people’s to-do lists.  I love reading other people’s secrets, being a grammar nazi, laughing at texts from last night and seeing what other people love and hate.
34. I’m the co-inventor of the word “snortcopter” along with Sheena Gates. What? It’s a real word. Even Urban Dictionary says so.
35. We have a sausage dog named “Dude”. He’s a tad on the neurotic/OCD-side and is incapable of not licking feet if he sees them. He’s also part-jack russell, which means he’s even crazier than your average run-of-the-mill sausage dog. Also, he looks funny, because he’s got the sausage dog body, and the jack russell legs. Still, he’s cute and The Kid loves him very, very much. We have, as of this year, also become owned by cats. Two of them, in fact. Two girl kittehs – Xena and Pixel. They’re both bird-killing machines, with an impressive (and ever-rising) body count. I’ve seen Pixel snap a bird out of the air, mid-flight!
36. I love cats. Seriously. They’re like the best pets ever. They’re easy to house-train. They’re cute. And best of all? The bird noises that they make. It’s like a 2-in-1 pet!
37. We’ve also recently become lizard parents. Mojo Jojo is the newest member of the household and this bearded dragon baby eats crickets. Read all about how we gave our lizard up for adoption, and why it was good for my sanity.
38. I love vintage handbags and sailor stripes. Comfy linen pants and flip-flops. I am obsessed with the blue willow china pattern and have been painstakingly collecting piece by piece of what will hopefully one day be a complete dinner set.
39. Things that bother me: audible mastication, people who don’t know how to use the indicators on their cars, people that don’t know how to use traffic circles. People that retweet their Follow Friday mentions. People who don’t thank other people who give them gaps in traffic. Paying for parking at malls. Malls. Speed bumps. Speed traps. People who stand too close behind me, or hover at my shoulder in a queue. Shops that don’t have debit card facilities. Camel toes. Visible panty lines. Skinny jeans. Crocs. Two-faced bitches. People who declare their undying love for each other on Facebook then like each other’s updates.
40. I love Foursquare. Like a lot. I love the badges and being mayor of nearly everything around me within a 10km radius. Mayor wars are fun. I’ve also discovered some amazing new spots through Foursquare – so it’s fun and useful!
41. Other things I love: being a mom, long hot bubble baths, procrastinating, Emily the Strange, peanut brittle, cloud-gazing, Hello Kitty, The Grim Adventures of Billy & Mandy, Oreo McFlurries, living in South Africa, Winter, scarves, spicy food, cheese, flamingos, peacocks, teapots, vintage tins, frames, bright colours and afternoon naps – as many and when ever possible.

Want more? Read my blog, bitches.