It’s easy for me to say that my change in lifestyle was a choice I made on my own. That deciding to throw in the towel with being a working mom, was my own doing. But the truth is, is that it wasn’t my own choice, nor was it my own doing.
If not for The Boyfriend, none of it would be possible. True, he supported me and his son for two years before I found a job, but this time ’round he’s been more supportive than I could ever have imagined. He’s the one who dried my tears while our Kid was sick in hospital. He’s the one who encouraged me to do what I wanted to do with my life, and to pursue what makes me happy. He’s the one who made it possible for me not to have to have a fulltime 9-5 job. He’s the one who talked me through all of the options and helped me pick up the pieces, when I thought there wasn’t going to be anything left to pick up. Countless times over the last four years.
He’s been there every time I needed him. He’s come to rescue me wherever and whenever I’ve needed it. He’s held my hand and calmed me down and helped me to be a better person. He’s shown me that you don’t need to be selfish to get everything that *you* want – all you need to do is look after those close to you, and they’ll do the same for you.
He’s the logic that speaks, when my gut instinct just wants to react, without thinking things through. He’s the firm foundation that lets me explore myself, and my place in the world as the mother of his child.
He’s the one that’s working late and weekends, to make up for the paycheque that I don’t get anymore. The one that’s sacrificed so much for me, and for his son. He’s the one that’s constantly seeking to better himself, to be a better father and to love his family more than he already does.
He’s the one that knows me better than myself. He’s the one that loves me in spite of myself. He’s the one that tries to give us everything, and more. He’s the reason why I am the person I am today. He’s the one that’s stuck by me, and has never let me down. Not once. It’s easy for me to say I’m lucky. But it’s not so easy for me to accept it, nor is it easy for me to feel I deserve it.
But, I guess that’s what makes me appreciate it all the more, lately. Right now? Right now I couldn’t ask for anything more.
Picture: Jeanette Verster Photography.