On Collecting Things

Screen Shot 2016-04-22 at 09.46.44In my previous life, I collected shoes and handbags. This was a life before children and when I discovered that I was pregnant, I tossed out all my heels. The handbag collection was cleared out once my firstborn arrived and I realised that a nappy bag was more important than a handbag. No longer do I collect these pretty feminine things, but still have the urge to collect something. What did I turn to? Some unusual things. It just sort of happened.

  • Blue willow crockery. The older, the better. If it’s from Occupied Japan, I’d pretty much shit in my pants to get it. I’m cool with the English versions of it too. Actually, I’m cool with alll of it. I have a cupboard full of blue willow teacups and I don’t even drink tea. This obsession with blue willow crockery has lead to an obsession with the pair of birds depicted in the blue willow design. Which lead me to House of Kallie’s jewelry made from old South African coins, depicting two sparrows. I wear this as my wedding ring and I have a matching necklace that my sisters bought me.
  • Cheeseboards. Not sure how, or why this started. I mean I love cheese, but not all cheeses. I try to stay away from cheeses that smell bad. Why I decided I needed more than one cheeseboard, who can say? I have urges. These urges involve buying cheeseboards.
  • Succulents. This one is not a secret, and it’s probably the most intense of all my addictions. I can’t drive anywhere without scoping out the gardens on the side of the road, looking for something new for my own garden.
  • Tarot decks. I haven’t used them in years, but I have more than a few of these. The fact that I can’t bring myself to part with them, means I still collect them. The urge to buy a new deck is merely dormant, until I see the right one.
  • Penis pamphlets. Those pamphlets that are handed out at the robot offering penis, bums, hips and breasts enlargements? Can’t get enough of them.
  • Teapots. Again. I don’t drink tea, but man I love me a good teapot. Even have a few in the garden, with succulents growing out of them.
  • Windchimes. I have these hung in the trees in the garden. My garden barely gets enough wind for them to tinkle, but I don’t care. Still makes me happy.
  • Recipe books. Can’t resist. Adore them. Yet only land up liking/trying 2-3 recipes from each book.

How bad is my urge to collect? So bad that my husband banned me from spending time on bidorbuy, trolling the antiques and collectibles sections. Not so bad that my house belongs on an episode of Extreme Hoarders.

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