Fuck Mothers’ Day, It’s MY Day

I’ve only had 2 (or 3 if you count the mothers’ day that passed while I was pregnant) Mothers’ Days happen to me in my life. I only have a 30 month old Kid. But already I’ve kinda come to despise it.

Before you judge me (actually, this will probably even give you more reason to judge me) I’m the kind of killjoy that hates birthdays and hates surprises and the worst kind of torture you could plan for me would be to give me a surprise birthday party.

The ninth day of December should, in my view, be just another day on the calendar. But nay, it’s another day on the calendar for people to buy me crap presents and force me to leave the house for “birthday lunch” and to socialise and make small talk when all I wanted to do in the first place was stay in bed and read books all day and eat pizza and smoke copious amounts of our friend maryjane. On my own. The only concession I would make to it being my birthday would be to stay in my birthday suit all day. But then, I’d do that every other day too, if I could – so that’s really just another indication of why my birthday  should be treated the same as every other calendar day.

And Mothers’ Day. Just another crap excuse to force me out of my house on Sunday, for breakfast. When I don’t even eat bacon, eggs, sausages or burger patties. Look, I appreciate the sentiment behind celebrating Mothers’ the world over. I really do. It gives those mothers who go unrecognised, their recognition and affirmation, at least one day every year. I’m down with that. But what about those mothers that are down with flying under the radar and rather being appreciated as a mother by enjoying the kisses from their child, the smile when he sees they see their mothers’ face.

I’m the kind of mother that would probably prefer hand-drawn cards to store-bought boxes of chocolate and heart mugs and ‘best mom in the world’ slippers. I’d rather have a piece of card with a crazily-drawn scarecrow with straw hair and and a heart and an arrow pointing to the stick figure with the letters ‘M-O-M’ emblazened on it. I’d rather have something my Kid made me in Art class, than a gift he paid money for.

Perhaps now once you’ve realised that this means I’m sentimental in a totally non-materialistic way, you’ll be less inclined to judge me when I say: I hate birthdays and I hate mothers’ days. Because it makes my Boyfriend feel pressurised into buying me presents. When he does so enough all the time, anyway. He feels compelled to buy me expensive presents when it comes to my birthday and mothers’ day. And really. That’s not what I want.

He got it right the first Valentines we spent together. Butterfly lawn decorations and thousands of fairy lights. Perfect. Nail on the head. Inexpensive, gaudy and right up my alley. And then for my 24th birthday a macbook. Not long after, a Blackberry. Then a car. And now, for mothers’ day he wanted to buy me a DSLR camera. And believe me, I want one. But I don’t want Mothers’ Day to be an excuse for it to be bought for me.

I want it to be bought on another day of the year, and I want it to be bought because it was something I really, really wanted. Like I knew that the Sony Bravia massivehugebigtelevision was for him. I didn’t buy it for his birthday, and I didn’t buy it for Fathers’ Day or for Christmas – i bought it FOR HIM.

And this is what’s going to happen next year: on Mothers’ Day my Kid and my Boyfriend will be shipped out of the house for the day. They can go to Gold Reef City and go on all the rides. Mommy will be left at home, in bed. With books, cigarettes and a plentiful supply of our friend maryjane, and I want to just be left the fuck alone. The day before, we will have done some family thing together and The Boyfriend will have bought me something that he knew I really wanted. Worst case scenario: we will shop for something I want. (Which we actually did this year, and it was cool*) Whatever happens, it will be MY day.

This is what’s going to happen this year, for my birthay: Absolutely nothing. I want to be left alone in peace to be grumpy and miserable about turning 26. That’s almost higher than I can count without losing count. Whatever happens, it will be MY day.

Look, don’t get me wrong. My entire mothers’ day yesterday wasnt a total write-off. Although I am still very miff about the fact that I had to miss my sisters‘ babyshower. And I spent two and a half hours in a parking lot getting yelled at by my Boyfriend**, in the blazing hot sun. I also felt sick and grotty, had to watch Astro Boy twice, and return the DVDs and fetch The Kid from his granny, and go to the shops to get cigarettes. Yeah, as you can see – there wasn’t much that was fun about yesterday.

* One of my Mothers’ Day gifts – Chris Van Wyk’s new book – “Eggs to Hatch, Chickens to Lay“. (click link to buy)  I got into bed with it last night, and I’m already nearly finished it. LOVE IT. Absolutely recommended as seriously good, funny reading.

**Parallel parking. In four months, I forgot how to do it.

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15 Responses to Fuck Mothers’ Day, It’s MY Day

  1. Wenchy says:

    I want that book. Been looking everywhere. Best price I can find is R195
    .-= Wenchy´s last blog ..May I never miss a sunset or a rainbow because I am looking down. =-.

  2. blackhuff says:

    I love it when people say that they more adore things that is made than bought. The whole world itself surround the fact that everything must be bought but I say, bull! Self made stuff are so much more worth it.
    .-= blackhuff´s last blog ..What’s happening =-.

  3. mommanats says:

    I spent my motehrsday in pj’s. My husband made breakfast and the rest of the day I was left alone to sleep, watch tv and surf the net. It was cool.
    .-= mommanats´s last blog ..Being a mom…………. =-.

  4. NickiD says:

    OF COURSE hand made things are better than store bought … but until Luca is big enough to do that for me, a SEXY pair of boots and 3 hours at the hairdresser is a FAB gift as far as I am concerned. For me, personally, a meaningful messagem in

  5. NickiD says:

    (Premature enter-pressing above)

    OF COURSE hand made things are better than store bought … but until Luca is big enough to do that for me, a SEXY pair of boots and 3 hours at the hairdresser is a FAB gift as far as I am concerned. For me, personally, a meaningful message in the form of a letter or card is ALWAYS the best.
    .-= NickiD´s last blog ..Happy Mothers’ Day =-.

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  7. Bobbi Janay says:

    I am no good at parking either. I want a day all to myself too, that sounds great.
    .-= Bobbi Janay´s last blog ..Potluck =-.

  8. kyknoord says:

    We don’t judge you. Much.
    .-= kyknoord´s last blog ..Eating people is wrong =-.

  9. Nope, no judging here. I would alsp like some me time above all. And nobody in their right minds can or care about parallel parking. It’s just so last century

  10. I need a day like that too… in my dreams. And yes, I agree, I don’t want expensive gifts… and bunch of flowers would have sufficed
    .-= Jeanette Verster´s last blog ..129/365 – Blinded =-.

  11. Angel says:

    I hear ya!
    .-= Angel´s last blog ..Competitions Mean Prizes… =-.

  12. Po says:

    Hmmm, this is how I feel about weddings, and I’m keeping firm on that one. A wedding is my idea of pure crystallised hell so I’m gonna be living in sin forever.
    .-= Po´s last blog ..Making my democratic debut =-.

  13. Fairy Girl says:

    I also love “home-made” gifts, straight from the heart!
    .-= Fairy Girl´s last blog ..Life is so precious “be grateful” =-.

  14. Jenny says:

    I totally get how you feel about holidays. But in our house they are just another day. The hubby is some kind of religion so he doesn’t do anything anyway. Kinda lame. but I guess I can deal with it 😉
    .-= Jenny´s last blog ..Yes, I’m a dork! =-.

  15. danyelle says:

    funny. i just saw this. i sorta kinda blogged the opposite last week. i actually enjoy mother’s day. it’s a lot less about me or what i can do or what i get than it is about my mom – remembering her and doing her things. nothing judgey. see how boring our lives would be if we all loved the same things at the same time?!

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